What does discrimination look like?

This will be perhaps one of the most difficult articles to write. Far from my comfort zone, I have decided to analyze, try to understand and write an article about discrimination, my story and what we can do as friends, co-workers or team leaders to prevent this from happening.

The story behind this article

It sure is something you don’t think about often. If you were born in a so-called first world country, it is certain that if you think about it, you only think about how proud you feel and how the world receives you wherever you go.

However, where you born is one of the things you don’t have any credit for. Maybe your parents, their parents, and the ones before them, who deserve all the credit.

A middle-class “bogotano”

For the first 40 years of my life I never gave much thought to discrimination. I am a man, I could be considered white in my country, and I am heterosexual. If you consider that I live in a conservative country with a Catholic tradition, I was in the safe zone.

I grew up in a middle-class neighborhood in Bogotá. I went to a traditional school. I finished my engineering studies at a great university. I got a good job, got married, and now I have a beautiful family.

I have been working in technology since my 20s. I have been teaching at the university for more than two decades. I believe in the power of good education to transform individuals, families, societies, nations, and the world.

A 100% Colombian, almost

Maybe there is one thing that could make me a little more Bogotano. A couple of years ago I began to hear, very occasionally, that I was not Colombian, at least not a real one. The first time I found it funny, the second time, a bit offensive, from the third time, it was clear: I was no longer a “usual” Colombian.

I was not born in Colombia. And even though I can’t remember a life other than this, even though I only have Colombian documents (all of them absolutely legal), despite studying and working all my life in the same city, I cannot change the past and the decisions of my parents - both Colombians - who lived outside the country at the time.

If you do not know the feeling, try this: bring attention to something that is yours, your name, your family, your identity or your nationality, and then consider for a moment that it is not recognized by others as yours, it is taken away by many people. It starts to feel weird and then you realize: you are being discriminated against for the sole reason of being.

Discrimination

The problem with the “you don’t belong here” or “you’re not the same as me” thinking, is that over time it isolates people. It starts with small things and little by little it becomes a barrier between groups.

And, as humans, we do it with everything. We tend to separate things: good and bad, black and white, rich and poor, local and stranger.

And the truth is that you rarely think about it. That divisive thinking is always there, but it only bothers you when the division leaves you in a different group than the one you were expecting.

I don’t want to continue writing about the bad things and the discrimination that little by little pushes me aside more and more in my own country. A passport renovation almost impossible to complete, an identity document and travel permit that cannot be renewed without explanation, or a bank account that I cannot have because I am not “a real Colombian” - despite the fact that I have been a citizen for more than 40 years. So let’s talk about leadership and how from some positions we can promote inclusive thinking and non-discrimination.

Challenges of Leadership

Leadership is a double-edged sword. It can be a transforming instrument for good, or it can bring out the worst in people. War, misery and indifference have had great, not to say, spectacular leaders.

We are used to strong and forceful leadership that moves masses. And, lastly, to the leadership that divides us, the one that deepens our differences and divides us.

Bad examples

The more I teach, the less fan of democracy I am. And please don’t get me wrong, I don’t advocate authoritarian and tyrannical models. However, I believe that uninformed and manipulated decisions by the effervescence of emotions make democracy an insufficient model.

Politicians know it. They know the weaknesses of human beings and how easy it is to misinform, manipulate emotions and divide. It is always easier to think of good and bad, red and yellow, than in a world full of colors and possibilities.

Do you remember the pandemic? Not long ago our world leaders first looked after themselves and put their nations above others. None of them really fought for a global partnership.

Fear is a powerful motivator. Nothing arouses more fear than the unknown, that which is different from us. Fear is also cheap. Courage, love and peace cost a lot of energy, dedication and resilience.

Unifying Leadership

The real challenge is to create leadership models that promote understanding of differences. Not the blind acceptance of each idea, but the promotion of the space to present, discuss and value the ideas, thoughts and efforts of all.

Uniting is more difficult than dividing. Unifying requires determination and effort. Throughout history, our best moments as a society have not been thanks to divisive and mobilizing leaders, warlords or warriors. Our best and most enduring examples of leadership, those that endure for centuries, are those who managed to understand and accept differences and convene and unify everyone.

Where to start?

There is something I like to do when I am afraid: I try to understand. I read, study and validate - with various sources like any good academic - what scares me, what I don’t know.

Of course I can’t do it with everything. Leading takes a lot of energy, physically and mentally, and if every decision requires deep learning, it could mean delays.

But what I can do is put together a team with different perspectives. Different visions and build with them a model where it is easier to illuminate what is darkest for us.

IDEA concept

A little less than a year ago, I accepted the role of IDEA Executive Sponsor at the organization I work for. If you don’t know what it means, IDEA is an acronym for Inclusion, Diversity, Equity and Awareness.

There is a lot of talk about the “woke movement” these days. Some people attack it and others defend it. Every day we radicalize more. We like to see the differences and for this we concentrate on the extremes: the most conservative against the most liberal, the best and the baddest. We cannot reconcile the fact that we can meet in the middle. It is not about normalization. It is about respect.

It is not about religion, race, gender or nationality. It is about equity. You can start by being aware - it does not mean you must accept at the beginning, but trying to understand makes you 100% better.

Before you go, read this

If you lead, if you have followers, and you feel dislike for something or someone, read, learn, try to understand.

I’m sure there are things we cannot understand. Surely there will be things that we will not be able to accept. But you should never stop trying to understand and accept.

If you lead, do not forget your followers. They deserve a safe space for expression, discussion and learning. You can share a vision of understanding without breaking your values. Dividing is simple, easy and cheap, but it is through unification that we evolve as a society.